Santa Banta Jokes

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Sardar’s Son – Papa jaldi-2 mera viya kra deo nahi ta main DAADI nal viya kra lavanga.
Sardar:oye tu meri MAA nal viya krayenga.!
Son:-kyo tusi meri MAA nal ni krayea..
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Santa : Meri biwi mujhe chorr ke chali gayi.
Banta : Tu uska khyal nahi rakhta hoga.
Santa : Arre yaar…Sagi behen ki tarah rakhta tha usko!
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Santa : Preeto chal honeymoon te chaliye.
Preeto : Mein velli nahi, main halle kapde v dhone e, te pande vi manjne e, tusi beeji nu le jao.
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English Teacher: “One cute and young girl is walking on the road.” Change this into an punjabi exclamatory sentence.
Sardar student:- “Oye,pataka !”
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SLAM BOOK filled by Santa.
1.Strength: My wife, Jeeto.
2.Weakness: Banta’s wife, Preeto.
3.Oppurtunity: When Banta is on tour.
4.Threat: When I am on tour!!!
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Clean SMS Jokes

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Santa : Yaar aaj mein bus ke peeche peecha daudkar three rupees bacha liye.
Banta : Kya yaar, tum to bahut murkh ho, agar taxi ke peeche bhagte to 100 rupees bachta!
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Air hostess: Aap 1 hours me 4 baar toilet gaye! R U OK? Kya aap ko chein nahi hai?
Santa: ‘Chain’ hai par khulti nahi hai!!!
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Wife: Please bike itni taze na chalao mujhey bahut dar lag raha hai.
Sardar: Agar tumhe bhi daar lag raha hai to meri tarah ankhein band karlo!!!
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Sardar to doctor: Jab mein sota hu to mere sapne me monkeys football khelte hai.
Dr: Koi baat nahi ye medicine sone se pehle kha lena.
Sardar: Kal se khaonga, aaj to final hai!!!
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Sardar Funny Jokes

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A sardar had a baby after 3 months of marriage. He suspected
and asked to his wife, “Ye 3 month me hi baccha kaise hua?”

Wife Replied : Tumhari shaadi ko kitne din hue?
Sardar :  Three months

Wife : Aur meri shaadi ko?
Sardar : 3 months.

Wife : Aur bacha kitne month ke baad?
Sardar : 3 months.

Wife : Total kitne months hue?
Sardar : Oye 9 months & start dancing Balle Balle!!!!
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Sardar ne makhi ke legs tod kar kaha, Ja udd ja..
Lekin Makkhi nahi udi, Sardar ne kaha..
“Aab to saabit ho gaya ki agar makkhi ke legs tod di jaye
to makkhi sun nahi sakti!!!”

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Ek sarder ne air-hostess se kaha, “Aapki shakal meri biwi
se bahut milti hai”.
Air-hostess ne ye sunte hi zordaar thappad uske muh pe mara…
Sardar foran bola : “Aadat bhi bahut milti hai”

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Ek din Santa jungle se gujar raha tha
Chudail ne use roka aur kaha : Ho ho ho Ha ha ha…Mein Chudail hu.
Sardar : Menu pata hai…kyunki teri ek behen meri biwi hai!

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Ek chor Sardar jee k mobile ko lekar bhar raha tha.
Sardar hasne laga
Banta : Wo tumhare mobile ko lekar bhag raha hai aur tum hans rahe ho.

Sardar : Bhagne do, charger to mere paas hai!

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Sardar ke radio me kuch problem ho gayi to aur kharab ho gaya
Usne radio khol kar dekha to ek mara hua chuha mila
Ye dekh kar sardar gussa ho gaya aur bola : Ye chalega kaise?
Sala singer hi mara pada hai
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More Funny Messages

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A funny theorem in mathematics :
Can you prove, 4=5
Yes it is true, here is the proof :
For this, we take three variable a, b and c.

Suppose, if :
a + b = c
We can also write the same in this way :
5a – 4a + 5b – 4b = 5c – 4c
=> 5a – 5b – 5c = 4a + 4b + 4c
=> 5 * (a+b+c) = 4 * (a+b+c)
=> 5=4 or 4=5

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Teacher : Santa and Banta!why you reached school late today?
Santa : Madam, I lost a one rupee coin and I was searching for it.
Teacher : Banta, what about you?
Banta : Madam. .., I was not able to move ….because I was hiding that coin under my feet.

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Teacher : Santa! Make a sentence using “Neither-Nor”.
Santa : When girls wear tight fitting dresses, “NEiTHER” are they
comfortable, “NOR” are we!

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