Husband Wife Jokes

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Wife : Darling kuch Saal Pehle Mera Figure COKE Bottle jesa Tha
Husband gusse se bola : Figure To Aaj B Coke jesa hi hai.
Pehle Reguler Bottle thi ab jumbo pack hai.
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Wife : Ye aap ki shirt per lipstick ka nishan
kahan se aaya?
Husband : Mein khud paresaan hu nishan dekhkar.
Maine tu uss wakt shirt utari hui thi.
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Wife : whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it,
I don’t know what to do?
.
.
.
.
Husband : Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them…
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Wife shopping karke wapas aayi,
To husband wife se samaan laate hue bola,
“Zaror Tm Mere Khane K Lye Kch Lai Hogi?”
Wife : Bilkul theek kaha, esme mere new sandel hain!!!
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Wife : What will u give me if I climb the great Mount Everest?
Husband : Le, isme pucchne wali kya baat hai…DHAKKAA!!!
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Wife to Hubby : Mein tumhari jindagi ki kitab hoon.
Husband : Yehi to afsos hai.
Calendar hoti to har saal change to kar leta!
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Mixed Collections Jokes

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Wife to Husband : Meri to koi aulad nahi hai isliye
sochti hu ki apni saari jaydad kisi sadhu ko daan kar dungi

Yeh sunkar pati uthkar jane laga

Patni : Tum kaha ja rahe ho?
Pati : Sadhu ban-ne
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Santa Banta se bola “Bhai aaj to chay peene ka maza aa gaya.”
Banta : Santa Jee, agar billi ne dudh me muh na mara hota to aur bhi
maza aata!!!
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Ek aadmi apne aap me kehta hu ja raha tha ki aisi zindagi se toh maut aachi.
Achanak Yamdoot aa gaya aur bola “Tumhari jaan lene ka hukm hai”
Aadmi : Lo batao, aab insaan mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta hai kya?
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Wife Saw Sign Board:

Nylon Saree
Rs.8/-
Cotton Saree
Rs.5/-
Banarsi Saree
Rs.10/-

Wife: Give me Rs.500 I’ll buy 50 Sarees.

Husband: Andhi! Dhobi ki dukaan hai
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